NHS HEADLINE UPDATE

1. It’s official, the NHS are worse than Sudan for causing patient deaths. 

New data reveal that the UK’s National Health Service (NHS) has a higher rate of deaths caused by harm from medical treatment than Sudan, according to the 2025 Global State of Patient Safety study. It is worth noting who authored the paper, Lord Darzi and James Titcombe. Rolls eyes. 

The NHS ranked in the bottom third of 205 countries for deaths from “adverse effects of medical treatment”, with a rate that has worsened compared with 25 years ago, while Sudan’s has improved over the same period. As in 2023, Norway again ranks first out of OECD countries in our patient safety ranking. The UK remains in 21^st place out of 38.

2. Don’t let a diagnosis of Cancer stop you from working! 

The NHS will help and encourage you to stay in work if you have cancer. According to the Telegraph, cancer is taking too much of a toll on the workforce. Stay tuned for a big announcement in the next few days. 

3. The NHS call in the exorcists 

Whilst the NHS remains in a state of collapse and patients continue to die in corridors, the NHS dug deep into the coffers to afford an exorcist. After staff complained that they had seen ghosts including a child in a red dress at a hospice in Norwich.  How much does it cost to employ the services of deliverance ministers these days? 

4. Nipah – nipping the next pandemic in the bud? 

The next ‘plandemic’ may be on the way. Nipah virus is causing quite a stir amongst scientists and medical professionals. Nipah virus infection is a zoonotic illness (meaning it can be spread between animals and humans) that can cause a range of illnesses. This time the suspects are fruit bats and the ‘flying fox’. Pigs can also carry the ‘virus’.  Although it can be spread quickly from person to person, it can also be contracted through contaminated food.  Symptoms in humans can range from an asymptomatic infection to a deadly condition called encephalitis, a serious swelling of the brain. 

Cases of Nipah have been discovered in West Bengal, India. Despite reassurances from the Indian Health Ministry, neighbouring countries have strict precautions in place. Many airports have been put on high alert and have been temperature screening passengers.

There is no cure or treatment for Nipah. However, we can all breathe a sigh of a relief knowing that there is an AI generated mRNA vaccination in the pipeline. Would you be tempted? 

5. Millionaire GP behind asylum seeker hotels

Companies connected to Dr Faisal Maassarani an NHS GP has been behind some of the asylum seeker hotels. A firm founded by him tried to evict 100 people from flats to make way for asylum seekers. Based in Liverpool, Dr Maasarani denies any involvement in the day to day running of the hotels. Of course he would. 

6. The UK loses its measles elimination status. 

A new study (who believes studies anymore?) states that the UK has lost its measles elimination certification after the disease circulated continuously for more than a year.

What better reason than to persuade, coerce and frighten parents into getting their children vaccinated (MMR). In the good old days, children were sent to measles parties in order to get it out of the way in childhood and to strengthen the immune system. How many children under 18 died of measles last year? 

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